"
Hammer: $20
Antifreeze: $10
The screams of your enemies and the lamentation of their women: priceless
There are some things money can’t buy; for everything else, there’s violence
"#light of my life #blood of my blood #twin #my miss j #my imp #my darkling #and she is perf
New hair cut
No more bohemian hairstyle for me. A fresh and straight cut that’s what I needed.
OMG IT’S SO PRETTY! Goddamn it wife, you make me miss having long hair!
#sorry I just needed my wife's gorgeous face on my blog #deal with it bitches #calonari #war council #Blood Of My Blood
The family tree of the War Council. Since this was made, Cal and I started expecting, so there should be a line with Adelphos, our unborn son. And Iambic became our collective niece. But it’s still the best we have.
For Owl, who wanted to know what the hell she’s getting into
#war council #Blood Of My Blood #owlintheclocktower #marchionessofblackadder #andachippedcup #valerieparker #calonari
owlintheclocktower replied to your post: When are we setting the date for this wedding of ours? I need to make sure I can fit it
into my completely empty schedule. I LIVE ONLY FOR YOU, BLOOD OF MY BLOOD.LET’S DO IT. Supposing one of your other incest wives isn’t going to object during the silly ”Speak now or forever hold you peace” bit.HOLD THE PHONE, I’M NOT MARRIED TO ANYONE ELSE. NO POLYGAMOUS MARRIAGES IN THIS FAMILY, OWL. JUST AFFAIRS BETWEEN SIBLINGS. WE KEEP IT CLASSY, OK.
And there’s only Val, and she’s off camping anyway, so PARTY HARD, AIN’T NO STOPPIN’ THIS TRAIN.
I get to be a bridesmaid, right? RIGHT? I HAD BETTER GET TO BE A FUCKING BRIDESMAID.
Val busts out in song, as usual
- Val: YO
- Val: THE NAME IS BATTY
- Val: THE LOGIC IS ERRATIC
- Val: POTATO IN A JACKET
- Val: TOYS IN THE ATTIC
- VaI: I ROCK AND I RAMBLE
- Val: MY BRAIN IS SCRAMBLED
- Marchie: Oh my god, Ru, run, she is actually on Drugs
#Never gonna give you up #Fuck I love these bitches #Blood of my blood #War council
The Best Way to Enrage a Phoenix (and Hedgehog)
- Marchie: ALSO RU
- Ru: ??
- Marchie: ABOUT THAT THING EARLIER
- Ru: which thing earlier?
- Val: WHAT THING
- Val: SECRETS?
- Marchie: THAT WE WERE RANTING ABOUT
- Val: WHERE
- Ru: OH YES THAT
- Val: WHAT THING
- Val: IS IT A SECRET
- Val: TELL ME
- Marchie: she messaged me and said yes that she would
- Val: TELLLLLLL MEEEEEEEEE
- Ru: YESSSSS
- Val: TELL ME
- Val: HELLO
- Ru: PERFECT
- Val: PHOENIX OVER HERE
- Val: HELLOOOOOOO
- Marchie: and then she called me her sun-and-stars
- Val: TELL MEEEEEEE
- Marchie: and we had a moment
- Ru: awwww I love her
- Val: TELL MEEEEEEEEE
- Val: WHAT
- Marchie: but she totally agrees with us
- Ru: ALL SHOULD AGREE
- Val: WHO CALLED YOU HER SUN AND STARS
- Val: THAT'S MY THING
- Val: WHAT THE FUCK
- Val: HELLO
- Marchie: and i was like SHE'S ONE OF US
- Val: I WILL SERIOUSLY BLOW THIS CHAT UP
- Val: DON'T MAKE ME
- Val: PING PING PING PING
- Ru: ONE OF US
- Val: PING
- Ru: ONE OF US
- Marchie: ONE OF US
- Val: PING
- Val: what am I invisible? HELLO
- Ru: ARE YOU NEARLY DONE YET?
- Val: YOU BITCHES
- Ru: WE NEED TO WORK ON RETALIATION XD
- Marchie: YES I AM ALMOST DONE SO FUCKING CLOSE
- Ru: yesssssss
- Val: I WILL FUCKING SHOOT BOTH OF YOU
- Chip: Now now, must things always end in violence?
- Val: THEY ARE IGNORING ME
- Chip: I'd hate to be responsible for the death of a family member.
- Val: THEY SERIOUSLY AREN'T ACKNOWLEDGING MY EXISTENCE
- Chip: DID NO ONE SEE THAT I JUST MADE A LION KING REFERENCE THERE
- Chip: REALLY NO ONE? YOU PEOPLE HAVE FAILED ME
- Chip: SCAR QUOTE
- Chip: SCAR TALKING TO SIMBA
- Chip: WHEN SIMBA COMES TO RECLAIM PRIDE ROCK
- Chip: FUCK PEOPLE
- Ru: lol
- Val: WHY AM I STILL BEING IGNORED
#yep loooooong #but it kind of sums us up #so yeah #this happened #god I love these bitches #war council #Blood Of My Blood
Best fandom ever. Actually, Best FAMILY ever.
Oh, dear Lord, Gold, you have Belle down to her underwear on your living-room with her leg across your lap. What the hell are you waiting for?
COMMENCE THE ADULT-TYPE TOUCHING. AT ONCE.
…
Clearly this ought to be a job for Nick the incorporeal creeper. Alas, wrong fic canon.
…is it wrong that I see that gif and INSTANTLY assume it’s Calonari? IS IT WRONG THAT THAT CREEPY PUPPET MAN NOW REPRESENTS MY WIFE IN MY HEAD?
Hello? HELLO? ARE ANY SURVIVORS OUT THERE? THIS IS THE PHOENIX SPEAKING, IS ANYBODY STILL ALIVE? WE HAVE A SITUATION IN THE WAR COUNCIL, I REPEAT, WE HAVE A SITUATION IN THE WAR COUNCIL. IT’S BLOODY, BOYS, THERE WEREN’T MANY SURVIVORS. RUN AND HIDE, BOYS, RUN. AND. HIDE. MAY WHATEVER LUCK YOU LIVE BY LAST THE NIGHT.
/SALUTES
…I’m kind of glad of timezones sometimes, to tell the truth. They don’t bug me when they know I’m sleeping :)
HOWEVER: I do hope everyone survived. NO KILLING JUST BECAUSE THE KID ISN’T AROUND TO SEE IT, GUYS, YA HEAR ME?
Fic Teaser: Sunday, The Early Hours
Since this beastie is coming out far longer than expected (it’ll be over 6,000 words at this rate) I thought I’d give you all a preview in case it takes much longer.
Time of Day series; sequel to ‘Saturday Midnight’I’ve a feeling that this “beastie” is going to kill us all
I haven’t even gotten to the really bad part yet.
I know my love, I know.
Wife is going to prepare a huge bowl of tiramisu just for you.
Those two cats are us. One is dark and evil and mean, and the other is affectionate and ginger. Perfect.
You are a wonderful wife <3
how affectionate can I act towards people on the internet before it gets creepy?
oh my god
tumblr unfollowed my husband
the light and soul of my heart
I’m so so sorry
forgive me my love
TUMBLR IS TRYING TO BREAK UP MY MARRIAGE!
OMG MY BABY COME TO ME, ALL IS FORGIVEN!OH GOD I STARTED PANICKING WHEN I SAW “FOLLOW +”
I LOVE YOU BB AND TUMBLR HATE US
SOMETIMES
I’M SO GLAD I DIDN’T NOTICE HAVING LOST SOMEONE, I WOULD HAVE BEEN HEARTBROKEN AND DIED INSIDE AND OMG I NEED A HUG RIGHT NOW.
TUMBLR CANNOT HANDLE THE AWESOME OF OUR MARRIAGE AND WANTS TO SPLIT US UP. BUT THEY NEVER EVER WILL.
I ain't scared of no Kelpie threats
- Chip: If I could, I would reach through the computer and slap you.
- Ru: LOL
- Ru: HOW WILL YOU DO THAT
- Ru: WHEN THE SECOND YOU DO I WILL BE HUGGING YOU TO DEATH?
- Ru: HMMMM
- Ru: TRY REACHING MY FACE THEN KELPIEBITCH
- Chip: .......
- Ru: thought so
- Chip: Shut up
#war council #andachippedcup #Blood Of My Blood
How I feel right now
After 3 red bulls
And 6 bananas
I love bananas
I’ve accomplished nothing !
Oh god brain, stop it.
I’m going to work.
Yes, now.
RED BULLLLL!
I BOUGHT ONE TODAY AND AM DRINKING IT NOW AND OMG ALL THE WORDS MY FINGERS MAKE WITH THIS TYPING MACHINE AND IT’S ALL DIRTY AND WE SHALL BE HYPER PROCRASTINATING MARRIED PEOPLE. YESSSS.
Although I have chocolate mousse, because the tiramisu at Sainsbury’s sucks now and is ruining my life. BUT STILL. ALL THE GOOD FOOD AND CAFFEINE.
WORK AND YOU SHALL BE REWARDED WITH SMUT.
War Council as pirates.
Because of Tim Curry as Long John Silver.Going clockwise, Marchie, Val, Chip, Ru, and Accio.
